Wedding Wednesdays: Togetherness.
Happy Wednesday Folks! I'm going to start right off the bat with a confession - I'm a weepy ball of emotion right now.
Yesterday, (July 1st), was exactly 4 months away from our wedding date.
The title of this post means so much to me right now. I truly believe that in the past month GOD has been humbling me and destroying the pride that sometimes tries to set itself up in my life under the guise of insecurity and self-preservation.
The Case of Cold Feet: (Another Confession) So as Danny and I make preparations to join together as one before GOD, perhaps what I struggled with most is accepting that it is okay to place myself in a position to need him.
For a long time needing someone, anyone, was a scary thing for me.
This was such a problem because it was evident even in my relationship with GOD. In my mind I had accepted being a loner, being an ugly duckling, being the black sheep and although I had wonderful relationships with people, especially the men in my life who were in a protector position - my ABBA, my father, my fiancé…
I still had this mentality, "I don't want to be a burden to anyone, not to my family, not to my future husband, not even God…by looking out for myself and no one else will have to worry about looking out for me."
And so for a long time I kept things to myself - observations, disappointments, hurts, even small joys and tried to heal on my own and celebrate with myself, but that only left me crippled.
Thankfully, through the love and patience of these same men in protector positions and the teaching I received in premarital class I saw the error of my ways.
Turns out we need people. Go figure. LOL.
In the month of June I got to attend three weddings, and my take away from each one was the importance of what it meant to be together.
There was so much togetherness!
From a man and woman becoming one to siblings or former small group members having a chance to get together again to two families coming together. The underlying theme was togetherness.
And the truth is I have never really been alone or a loner.
At this stage of life I have an AMAZING man who has agreed with all his heart to do life with me - together. From wedding planning to sharing disappointments (like rejection letters as I seek to find a better employment opportunity) he is hands-on, present, and he doesn't back down when things get difficult. I'm so blessed that he would share his strength with me.
I have met amazing women who make themselves available not only to me but to those in need around them and who set wonderful examples of what it means to be a woman, Child of God, mother, friend, sister, etc. just through their openness and love through every interaction and every invitation - Shout out to Mrs. Kimberly H., Mrs. Martine B., Mrs. LaWanda K., Ms. Katia M., Ms. Elisheva R., Ms. Rhana G., Ms. Jamesha J., Ms. Wanesha S., Ms. Allante M., Ms. Ashley W., Ms. R'zelle B., Ms. Tamara L., Ms. Lauren H., Ms. Ebonne B., Ms. Lizzy S., and Ms. Yohanna R.
When I was in college - I had a chance to share life regularly with a group of amazing women through the form of a weekly Bible study many of whom I'm still in regular contact with to this very day: Kelly A., Mary W., Kisha C., Kaiya C., Carine N., Mercedes Y., Dafnie N., Marsha D., Andrea P., Kelsey C., DeAnna C.,
In high school I was part of a "crew" that made the most of our nerd status - Camille S., Angela B., Fatima F., Sheeba D., and my true blue partner in crime and anchor for all 4 years Zipporah M. who I totally blame for putting me in this sentimental mood after reading again and replying to a beautiful email she sent me!
My first childhood friend and peer on the books Jodi-Ann C. who I had the opportunity to reconnect with years after falling out of contact.
And throughout my childhood and even now, GOD blessed me with a best friend, mentor, and sister in a one Mrs. Kerry B.
Not to mention being born into a large family Johnson Taylor which houses a plethora of aunts and uncles and cousins.
As if that wasn't enough my future in-laws love have loved me like I've always been one of their own - older sisters Chennia, Marvia, Joy. Cousin Nelly.
Any time I have been alone or felt alone it was because I chose to be alone - and inadvertently isolated or alienated myself. I have created the hermit tendencies I sometimes see within myself.
But once I'm married I will no longer have that option.
I will no longer have being one person to myself as an excuse to be, feel, or act as though I am alone. There will not only be the ever constant company of my heavenly Father but also the physical company of my husband.
Togetherness - affectionate closeness. Is crucial to life. To your life. To my life.
As one quote so beautifully articulates
When "I" becomes "We"
Even "Illness" becomes "Wellness."
I'm so incredibly thankful today for the people that GOD placed on my path up until this point. There have been many others that I have failed to name. I truly wish this wedding budget and space was unlimited so that Everyone those I've named and those I didn't could all join in on all the different events.
With that being said Here comes my BIG reveal
Here is our Save-The-Date that our wonderful designer Yohanna Reis made for us. It features our initials and our tree logo.
Also, our wedding website has gone live - www.danielandcara.com - woot woot! Thanks to Yohanna's awesome logo design and a great wedding wire template it has come together nicely.
The website will continue to be updated, especially with pictures in the coming weeks.
Feel free to stop by and take a look and if you do sign our guest book!! :-)
Thankfully, our wedding planning is coming along. Definitely less stressful and becoming more exciting!! Danny and I have taken back the reins as far as contacting vendors directly and that has helped with the lag time we were experiencing and keeping us within budget.
Togetherness and expanding that to include as many family and friends as we can is important. However, we're doing the opposite when it comes to vendors and are trying to limit the number of vendors we're using to as few as possible.
This past weekend was a wedding double header.
Here is my Wedding Weekend Double Header Recap in Pictures (Saturday in The Swamp. Sunday in The A.):
One last thing before I leave you...
Last Wedding Wednesdays (June 18th, 2014) Poll Result
What was Cara's favorite part of Marc and Martine's Wedding? 37.5% of voters chose the Traditional Cameroonian Wedding. There was a tie with 12.5% of voters choosing the other options: The Vows at the Traditional American Wedding, Marc and Martine's Traditional Cameroonian Garb, Martine's Traditional American Wedding Dress, Food and Dancing both nights and other.
I'm so glad Marc and Martine opted for both the traditional Cameroonian wedding and the traditional American wedding. I enjoyed every minute of that weekend and it's hard to say what I liked best. So I would have sided with you that chose other.
No poll with today's post. I've already said and done too much! LOL
Next week's Wedding Wednesday post promises to be a good one for those who love fashion. I'll be talking about the wedding dress - which I haven't bought yet by the way.
This was a supremely long post but this is one way I attempt togetherness - by sharing all this with each and every one of you who takes the time to read this I am seeking to expand our affectionate closeness.
Thank you for sharing this journey with me! Loving you...all of you,
-CN